2017 ended with what felt like gale force winds and stormy skies. It was an interesting year for sure. It showered me with a few blessings, a new place, a new full-time job in a career I thoroughly enjoy, a teenager…
And it was wrought with pain and hurt, filled with challenge after challenge that tested my strength on every level. The challenges got worse as the year progressed. Physical and mental health challenges, relationship challenges, that teenager… oh what a challenge that one!! Ending…literally days before Christmas… with the closure of my workplace that had felt like home and the loss of that full-time job that had allowed me the shifts that I had made in my life this year.
And the weight of the last few months was almost unbearable. I felt myself suffocating, drowning, barely clinging on… almost ready to quit it all.
And so I did what I do when the world starts to spin out of control. I withdrew from the chaos and found the eye in the storm, that quiet place within, from which I watch my life and anchor down the things that are spinning out of control.
I took stock of my strengths and reminded myself of who I am.
I replayed the mistakes I made and took notes so I can learn from them and not repeat them.
I flexed my emotional and mental muscles so I don’t get crushed by the weight of those painful emotions and negative thoughts.
I am not the storm.
I am not the chaos.
I am not the pain.
I am stronger and bigger than all of it. And I am more than capable of overcoming these challenges. Because I never give up. And I will never surrender. I will be the change I want to see.
Nothing worth having comes easy, and I have always fought to create the things I want in life. I have learned that the things that I want are worth the effort. And so I begin 2018… a little banged up, a little bruised… but stronger, wiser and more self-aware than I was last year. More determined to chase away the demons that plague me and more solid in my resolve to strengthen myself so that I can weather any storm heading my way.
For they will come.
And I will be ready.
Happy new year.
May we all find the courage to face our demons and the strength to weather the storms that are coming.
